The Pain
Of manifesting the truth
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This manifestation was easy.
It always is.
I'm a serial monogamous.
The one thing I know how to do well is end a relationship, heal, regroup, refocus and draw in the level of love and affection I desire.
This healing process has been a bit different. If you have read my newsletters, you know that about a year and a half ago, I ended a relationship that pulled at my childhood wounds of abandonment and sent me crawling to therapy to regain my stride.
After my last long term-this is the ONE-relationship ended in 2020, I decided to cut the shit and look within so that I could attract a life partner and end this string of serial monogamy.
Within the last 18 months, I have had daily visions in my meditations of a peaceful life lived with an incredible man. Through those visions, I asked myself what I would need to learn and grow to be an equal match for that man, and I got to work spiritually, financially, and psychically.
-This is the key to “manifestation”, doing the inner work to align yourself.-
I learned to love myself the way I envision him loving me.
Through that exploration, I found a new connection to God. I began to love and look at myself the way I was taught God does: unconditionally and abundantly.
I wrapped myself in people, places, and things that poured into me and when I felt full…
I got on Bumble! YES HONEY!
My first phone conversation a few days later was magical.
The subsequent in-person date lasted for hours.
Slap…
I had manifested him.
All systems go!
But then the pain started…
Less than 4 weeks later I am sitting in my car using both asprin and a 12 minutes Yoga Nidra by Tracee Stanley to relieve a tension headache after talking to the man I had “manifested”.
My headache started as a dull ache 12 hours prior, after a fury of passionate pain he shared with me about his past relationships.
The pain started in my left shoulder and, by morning, had wrapped my whole head in tension.
Something had been triggered.
Time to listen to the pain in my body.
My truth
My expansive love and clear communication with the God within…
Can pain and pleasure live in the same tension?
Can fear and Love?
Part two tomorrow…
Accessing this type of love and power has been a practice. There are ups and downs and so much to learn. I love sharing the foundations of these intuitive gifts through stillness and sound healing practices. Sitting with sound allows your body to feel the truth of all that you are holding but denying. Join me for Mastery of LOVE, a sound bath series.
This is a four part series, you can pick one session or all four. Because sharing is caring, you can pay what you like and forward the zoom link to a friend, love, coworker or your next date :)